family matters

So my aunt, the one whose house I used to go to when I was smaller, is in the hospital with congestive heart failure. My mom doesn't seem to think she'll last too long. Most of me doesn't care, but a small part of me does. Not too long ago my uncle, her husband, was … Continue reading family matters

still here, still struggling

Well, here we are again. Trying to patiently wait for something we aren't quite sure even exists. Life is hard, yet we continue to put one foot in front of the other. Perhaps our will to live currently outweighs that of dying. We've been trying to be more honest in therapy and it's hard. The … Continue reading still here, still struggling

awkward coversations

Have you ever had those really awkward conversations with your therapist? Well, I broke down and told him about my horrible self-image issues with all the weight I've gained since I've started on my current meds. He was very nice and understanding--like always--but it still felt really uncomfortable. Two new issues came up during our … Continue reading awkward coversations

a New Year

I'm not sure where to start or what to say. Does that mean that the words swirling around my brain serve no purpose? I'm not sure. Nothing stands out for me that might have happened since my last post but for some reason I can feel myself curling into a little cocoon, sheltering me away … Continue reading a New Year

chaos

My recent interactions with my ex's wife in regards to M has gotten me to think about how Christmas was for me growing up. I remember it like it was yesterday and the only word to describe it was chaos. From the minute the holidays started it was like an overload of visiting and eating … Continue reading chaos