it’s done

On Wednesday evening my Auntie told my mother about the abuse I suffered from my two cousins. On Thursday morning my mother came out and stayed camping with us. Guess what she said to me? Nothing. Not a fucking word about any of it other than my Auntie asked her to give me a hug … Continue reading it’s done

it doesn’t belong to me

Ever since I've decided to let my Auntie talk with my mother, I've been feeling different. I can't really tell if it's a good different or a bad different, though. It's just different. I had my session yesterday with T--the first since I've decided--and for the most part I wasn't even really there. T asked … Continue reading it doesn’t belong to me

decision made

I found a piece of paper on the weekend with words written around this time last year and as I read it, I had to catch my breath. I was going through what felt like the hardest period of my life and I was absolutely certain I wanted to die. And while the certainty has … Continue reading decision made

what to do…

I know I sound like a broken record here, but I just don't know what to do about my mother. I feel very alone in this world of mine, even though T is along for the ride with me. The aloneness is just a feeling--I know that--not an actual thing even though that’s exactly the … Continue reading what to do…