They say there two ways of thinking:
1. black and white – right/wrong, yes/no, good/bad, start/finish.
2. gray – moving forward, a step closer, an opportunity to learn, things end in -ish (right, wrong, finished).
I am a black and white thinker. It feels safe to me. Things are happening or not happening. Something is good or it’s bad. A person performs well or isn’t performing at all. There are start dates and finish dates. Things happen sequentially in a linear, orderly fashion.
My brain loves the idea that this is how the world works. It craves the clarity of a world that unfolds in a straight line. It’s happy if there’s a plan and it takes comfort that if we stick to it, everything will be okay.
T doesn’t agree. He doesn’t understand how the way I think, feel and live in the extremes can make a person feel safe. He says black and white isn’t how the world works.
Apparently, life unfolds from a world of gray. There are trade-offs and risks and safe decisions don’t always provide a payoff. Gray thinking requires emotional intelligence and not having it shuts down your ability to see what’s actually happening and respond accordingly.
I don’t know if I can’t get used to feeling around in the dark because knowing where the light switch is, isn’t what’s needed. I don’t know how to be okay with gray.
I wonder if it’s possible to live in both worlds?